Just Wow ? ? ?

People are supposed to keep their head held high even when facing adversity.. When things don't go your way.. you should always look on the bright side of things.. and move on.. I wanted to life experiences that will make me grow as a person.. Things I want to witness and experience to make me appreciate the things I have in life.. I haven't even stepped a foot in Hong Kong.. but I've already experienced these things.. I've gone from having a pretty good job to absolutely nothing.. I wrote an exam that really does me no good.. but makes me think i m intellectually smart.. But I've played the game all wrong.. Even though I won't have to worry about food and shelter.. There are more mental aspects that I've lost.. I lost confidence.. lost pride.. and most of all.. I think I have really been humbled after 9 months of this.. I asked for it.. Without even relocating.. I got what I asked for and much much more.. When will things turn up? I really don't know.. Going to Hong Kong or not is already irrelevant.. I don't have that adventuring mentality anymore.. Over these past 9 months.. I've experienced what I wanted to experience.. There are reasons why so many people don't do things on their emotions.. Think things through.. and fail to take action.. Reasons I didn't foresee.. Is it too late now?? Who knows.. Have I hit rock bottom? Who knows.. The only thing I do know is.. I messed up.. I really messed up..